It was just about this time last year that George W. Bush came to my door, begging for trick or treat candy. I gave him some, and in no time he was back for more. Just like in real life. It seems that most of the top Halloween masks these days are the faces of politicians…which I think is appropriate. Kids are pretending to be politicians, and politicians are acting like kids…who have nuclear bombs. Hard to think of anything much scarier than that. The kids knock it off after Halloween. Unfortunately, the politicians keep right on going.
I know a real live witch. A cigar smoking, truck driving, witchy woman. Man, what a woman. Her real name is Lisa, but her friends call her Olga. Olga the Witch … long black hair, voice like a purr with fur, and a long slow motion smile. I didn’t see Olga walk into the studio. I just looked up, and she was suddenly standing there in studio 2b at WNBC radio a lot of years ago. The idea that she just “appeared” was probably just my imagination. Maybe.
The 10PM to Midnight portion of my show was music, and Midnight to 2 AM was talk. And I always liked to have “ordinary” people who did extraordinary things as guests on the talk portion. So just before Halloween, I asked for mail from folks who figured they qualified, and Olga’s note said, “I’m a witch.” It was a slam dunk.
The lights at WNBC studios were New York Neon, and Olga purred something about how comfortable we’d be if I’d turn off the overheads and do our interview by the light of a candle she’d brought. If it weren’t for the Federal Disc Jockey Regulations, plus the fact that my crack NBC tech/accomplice Vic Lombardo was only one heavy breath away, and of course the certain knowledge that my lady Wonder Wench was listening, things could have gotten a little out of hand right there. Olga was fascinating. I mean in other ways too. She’s a follower of the ancient pagan religion called Wicca. It’s about love of nature, gentleness toward humans and animals, and very ancient legends about tall trees, shadow creatures, and the moon. No devil worship, no broomsticks, no haggle tooth hags. Olga is beautiful, smart, sensitive and loyal. I invited her back for several shows and eventually got to know her pretty well. As a matter of fact, she became a real friend to Wonder Wench, our son Mark and me.
Mark was 14 when Olga came into our lives. He often came to the station with W. Wench and me on Friday nights. Friday nights were “Mouth vs. Ear” nights on my show. “Mouth vs. Ear” was a quiz show. We always won, because we cheated. More about that another time. But for now, just picture the fact that besides W. Wench and Mark, there were lots of friends in the studio with us on Olga’s first night as a member of the “Mouth” quiz show team. And she was lively, happy, and bra-less when she threw her arms around Mark and gave him a loud, juicy, bouncy kiss smack dab on the mouth.
Mark was big with the girls at 14. But Olga was all woman. His ears wiggled, his hands stuck out from his arms at a strange angle, and he didn’t start breathing again until sometime late Saturday afternoon.
That was lots of years ago, but when I asked Mark yesterday if he remembered, he said something like, “ooohhh yessss.”
Our “Mouth vs Ear” friends and I had a softball team called “The Cheaters.” (Remember, we always won the quiz because we cheated.) Olga never played, but she came to watch and witch. We won a lot of games that year. It was either the lively ball or the way Olga twitched her … nose. A year or so after she joined our crew, Olga fell in love and moved away with her guy. We’ve lost track of her over the years, and I was wondering … this blog gets around now … and maybe someone reading this might know her. I don’t want to give you her last name for obvious reasons. And that wouldn’t be necessary anyway. Because there’s only one Olga like this warm and wonderful witchy woman. If you know her, I’d appreciate it if you’d ask her to drop an email to Dick@DickSummer.com . Wonder Wench, Mark and I really miss that cigar smoking, truck driving, fur purring, witchy woman.
Dick’s Details Quiz – All the answers are in this week’s “Good Night” PodCast at www.DickSummer.com .
1- Why is it a waste of time to be worried about sharks when we go swimming in the ocean?
2- How come prostitution is legal in Nevada, and no where else in the country? 3- Why do more Louie-Louie Generation guys than girls wander around in the middle of the night?
Scoring:
3 – right – A beautiful, sexy witch/warlock will show up at your front door in about ten minutes.
2 – right – Somebody will give you the entire first season of “I Dream Of Jeannie” on dvds for Christmas/Hannukah/Quanza/Solstice.
1 – right – The Wicked Witch of the West will bring back your ruby slippers.
0 – right – George W. Bush will invade your house and take all your candy and give it to Haliburton.
Some people tell me that they don’t know how to listen to the PodCast. Here’s how you do it: Go back to www.DickSummer.com and left click on the “PodCast” icon at the top right of the home page. That opens another page with a box that shows the last three PodCasts. Left click on one of them. That opens another page which says listen or download. If you want to listen right away, click on listen. If you want to download it to listen later, click on download. That’s it.
The PodCasts are called “Good Night.” Most times, they help put you to sleep with a little story about what happened to me during the week, a bedtime story, and a smile. This week is a little different. I recorded most of it while I was up wandering around at night. That’s the best time to listen to it…while you’re getting ready to hit the sheets. That’s why it’s called…”Good Night.”
Comments/ideas/suggestions…to Dick@DickSummer.com .
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