Dick Summer Connection

One of my all time favorite “Mixed Up” stories is part of  today’s podcast. It’s about a husband and wife who were scheduled to attend a Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested. But she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by her not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, woke without pain, and as it was still early, decided to go to the party. As her husband didn’t know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume, cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every “babe” he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her. She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. After more drinks he finally whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had made mad, passionate love in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed. Wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behavior. She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had. ‘Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you’re not there.’ Then she asked, ‘Did you dance much?’ He replied, I’ll tell you; I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met my brother Pete, Bill Brown and some other guy, so we went into the spare room and played poker all evening. ‘You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker all night!’ she said with unashamed sarcasm. To which the husband replied,˜actually, I gave my costume to the host. Apparently he had the time of his life’ 

My Lady Wonder Wench’s magazine says that women’s favorite dream is quote…” being submissive.” As I put so delicately in today’s podcast, “What the hell is THAT all about ? SUBMISSIVE …If I told any of the Louie-Louie Ladies I know they should be submissive, they would reply with the world famous one finger salute.” Why did an all knowing, All Loving, and All Just Creator make it so hard for me to figure women out ? I checked into some of the preacher shows on tv for some possible answers last night. But I struck out. By the way, you’ve got to be careful looking for those preacher shows…especially the pay per view ones. Just because you hear a woman yelling things like “Oh God, oh yes, yes, yes, Oh God yes”…that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve found a certified preacher show.

Just back from the Hall of Fame induction. What a trip. As Big Louie says in my book, “You can never tell when something wonderful is going to happen.” And this was wonderful. There are pages of emails and facebook posts that I’m going to catch up on as soon as possible. Gotta take a day to unwind with my Lady Wonder Wench today. 

I have a confession to make in today’s podcast. Sometimes I get up in the middle of the night, and sit here in my big, comfortable black leather pappa chair in the living room, and I sneak a look at my Lady Wonder Wench’s magazines…in what is probably a futile attempt to learn something…anything…about women. When I’m trying to figure out what’s going on in a woman’s mind about a situation, It could give an asprin a headache it’s so confusing. For example, here’s a statistic that says 6 out of 7 women wear clothes to bed. Why do you people do that ? One of the great lines in the classic Elizabeth Taylor/Richard Burton Cleopatra movie is when Cleo is giving Ceasar a hard time about his wife, and she says, “I hear your wife even wears clothes to bed.” I suppose it’s ok if you’re a kid, and you’re used to wearing your jammies to bed…but if you’re a grown up Louie-Louie Generation Lady…you must have figured out by now that you shouldn’t be in bed with somebody you shouldn’t be in bed with. And if you ARE in bed with somebody you shouldn’t be in bed with, why the heck would you be wearing clothes ? Unless of course we’re talking about something from Victoria’s Secret…which is a whole different idea. But according to Lady Wonder Wench’s magazine, most women don’t wear sexy stuff to bed, they wear T-shirts and boxers to bed. To which, Big Louie, his own bad self, the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie Generation says…”Hey, it would make more sense to TAKE boxers to bed.” That’s what you call Louie-Louie Logic. And I like it. More about this in today’s podcast. 

As I told you in today’s podcast, I’m going to Massachusetts for the Broadcaster’s Hall of Fame induction this weekend, so I won’t be posting for a few days. It will be good to meet for some serious discussions about the state of modern radio with my fellow broadcasters. 

Today’s podcast is about being elected to the Massachusetts Broadcaster’s Hall of Fame. It’s a huge honor for a radio show I did a long time ago…before there were distractions like this.

Today’s podcast is about opening a treasure chest of memories. 

I’m going to tell you something I never thought you’d get to hear in today’s podcast.

Thank you for dropping in on my podcasts. I really enjoy your company. The new one is up today. It’s about sitting here in my big, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room trying to figure out how to explain why a guy wants to become a disc jockey, because I have to tell you about a wonderful thing that happened to me. Clint Eastwood understood that guys want to become disc jockeys mainly to get girls. That’s why he loved starring in and directing “Play Misty For Me” all those years ago. If you’re too young to remember, Jessica Walter was the young lovely, purring on the phone… “Dave, please play Misty for me.” Every time the request line rings (it doesn’t actually ring, it lights up), every disc jockey I’ve ever known gets a quick vision of a scantily clad young lovely, slowly flexing her long, tapered legs and licking her lips, just waiting to breathe her request into his ear. There is no other reason for a young guy to want to become a disc jockey. Until you get to the big time, the money stinks. Especially for a late night disc jockey. And the amazing thing is that often the vision of the lady involved is reasonably accurate. Not always, but more often than you might think. 

Today’s podcast is about a naked secretary, a horny college kid, and a balky radio transmitter. It’s kind of biographical.