Archive for June, 2009

I’m not alone

Tuesday, June 30th, 2009

It’s nice to know I’m not alone:

Hey there, Dick.  Happy (belated) anniversary to you, too!  Keep doing what you do!!!.  I really look forward to checking out your blog and podcast each week. (And, your “Dickie-Quickies”, too.)   Sometimes I miss……due to work, etc. But I always get to check them out eventually, and I make sure never to skip one.

First of all, I wanted to tell you not to feel too badly about forgetting your own anniversary.  I suspect that you share this issue with millions of other guys.  (Just ask any woman!!!)

Much like LWW, I hung a framed copy of our wedding certificate on the wall of our bedroom.  I did this for two reasons:  first, it was beautiful.  (Bill and I got married on the beach in Maui, and it’s got orchids and all kinds of neat stuff and calligraphy on it.)  Second, he’s always told me that he’s bad with remembering dates: birthdays, anniversaries, you name it. So, I figured I’d “idiot-proof” our anniversary.  But, hey.  I didn’t count on that “guy” thing.  It seems that men (and I’m generalizing here) do NOT place anniversaries (or dates “to be remembered” of any kind) up there in the “very important” compartment of their compartmentalized brains.  Yep, men (unlike most women) have the ability to compartmentalize their thoughts each and every day!

Remember that book, “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus?”  There was a lot of truth in that tome.  It seems that entire thought processes are gender-specific.  A great example of this is the gal whose boyfriend is driving her home after a night out.  She tries to make conversation on the ride home, and all she gets are monosyllabic responses.  She says goodnight and closes her door behind her only to begin obsessing about why he wouldn’t converse and therefore what was wrong with the relationship.  She calls her best friend on the phone and together they try to work through what is happening.  “Is there someone else?  Are they growing apart?? etc etc etc.

Meanwhile, the boyfriend, on the way home, is still trying to figure out why the “service required” light is showing on his dashboard.

just thought I’d let you know your not alone on forgetting anniversaries I’ve been married to my bride for 38yrs. together 40yrs. probably been home for 15 of them so sometimes in the middle of a long night I’ll go sh— and remember it’s our anniversary so at 2am i make a call and it is like I never forgot (she knows i did but keeps it ) Dick they know were not perfect if they thought we were they would have moved on and not picked us out of the crowed. they wanted reality not perfection ( which we know`we are  in our minds). Someday I’ll write about meeting the lovely lady I met one Saturday afternoon helping a friend get some 2ND hand furniture and ended up with 40yrs of what a life!!

Happy Anniversary…only a month late

Saturday, June 27th, 2009

On the wall right by my side of the bed, there’s a framed needlepoint that my Lady Wonder Wench did a few years ago. It’s about being married to her best friend…and it has our wedding anniversary date on it…and I forgot our anniversary anyway this year. I FORGOT OUR ANNIVERSARY. I look at this needlepoint every morning when I get up, and this morning I was thinking, “well, I better get Lady Wonder Wench something nice…our anniversary is coming up…let’s see when was it…YAHHAAAA.”


Lady Wonder Wench doesn’t deserve this. Her only bad habit is me. If smarts were oil, I’d be a quart low. I’ll bet my dad never forgot his wedding anniversary. He taught me everything I know. But obviously he didn’t teach me everything he knew.


As Big Louie, his own bad self, the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie Generation always says, “Finding the perfect woman isn’t the whole job. You’ve got to find the perfect woman who isn’t looking for the perfect man.”


Lady Wonder Wench just gave me that soft smiley look when I said “I’m sorry.” Then she closed her eyes, and gave me a kiss that seriously softened the fillings in my teeth. And I hope you will be just as forgiving… because I forgot our anniversary too this year. It was last month. This is three years. I’m sorry. I’ll buy you guys a beer next time I see you. And it would be nice if those of you who are not guys…would just please smile and pucker up.


Anyway…happy anniversary…only a month late. I promised I’d tell you the top five most downloaded podcasts of the year on our anniversaries, so here we go for anniversary #3.


The fifth most downloaded podcast this past year was published last July 27th.

It’s called “The Sounds of Silence.” It was about thanking those of you who sent Lady Wonder Wench cards, and teddy bears, and balloons when she was in the hospital. And it was about how silent the house was when Lady Wonder Wench was in the hospital…that terrible silence where her Lady sounds should have been. Quiet is comfortable. Silence screams.


Big Louie, his own bad self tried to cheer me up a little with a great quote. He said, “Things won’t be the way you remember them when she comes home, although that’s what you might hope, Things will be just what they are for a while, so be careful you don’t slip on the soap.”      


But looking back at that time, it felt like I was standing outside myself, trying hard to get back in. Thank you for helping me through that time. Thank you. All of you.


The number four most downloaded podcast was posted just a few weeks ago. June 7, 2009. It’s called the Google Giggle. It’s about that little voice in your head that makes nasty comments, and sings snatches of songs over and over and over again. I call that little voice your giggle…because it’s really important, but it can get you mad. And getting mad at yourself doesn’t help. But you can’t get mad at something that makes you giggle. That’s why I call that irritating part of you, Giggle. Giggle is also the part of you who hides your glasses on the top of your head, and slips your car keys into the pants you just hung in your upstairs closet. It also grows little hairs on your tongue that you can’t find with your fingers, and sends you into the next room and when you get there it won’t remind you of what you’re looking for. There are lots of kinds of giggles. For example your gaggle giggle…it makes you stutter when you’re trying to explain something you did to a traffic cop. And there’s ED the Gangster giggle who stars in Viagra commercials…and makes life embarrassing in romantic moments. And toughest of all is the Gotcha giggle. It sometimes grabs me and won’t let go…when I see a little baby laugh, or I’ve got to say a last goodbye, or sometimes…when I hear Taps, or Silent Sight, or Amazing Grace.  Your Giggle can getcha.


The third most downloaded podcast this past year was originally posted on October 1, 2006. It’s called Growing Up With The Truth. Growing up can hurt. So can telling the truth. That’s why some of us do neither. Mostly we are guys. I cannot tell you a lie. The kid next door has my potato pop gun, and I want it back. But she’s five, and I’m not going over there and knocking on her dad Randy’s door and telling him, “I want my pop gun back.” Life can be cruel when you’re faced with growing up.


The second most downloaded podcast this past year, was originally posted back on February 3, 2008. Its called a Single Rose for Peter Paul and Mary. Any real Louie-Louie Generation lad or lady will know where Puff The Magic Dragon lived… although you may have temporarily forgotton. We sometimes do forget very important things like that. My Lady Wonder Wench and I joined a bunch of other sixties kids at a Peter, Paul and Mary concert. It was an evening I will never forget. Especially the Mary part. Mary Travers…frail from a long battle with cancer…almost inhaling the music…sitting on a stool because standing was too much pain…getting stronger by the minute…until their last song…when she struggled to her feet…smiled like sunshine…and belted out the soprano lead to Puff, The Magic Dragon. That…I will never forget. By the way, Puff lived in Honalee.


Which brings us to Number One. Number one by such a huge margin that I have no way to explain the numbers. It was posted on November 19, 2008. It’s about a tiny clump of hair that set off a shriek that could be heard from here to Labrador. It’s a tale of lurking intrigue and falling down laughing at a major U.S. airport…Philadelphia International. My Lady Wonder Wench was returning from an all girls vacation in Mexico with our daughter Kris, and a couple of female friends. I met her at the airport sporting a mustache and beard, and wearing a slouch hat and sunglasses. And she didn’t recognize me right away…even when I walked over and planted a super smooch on those ruby lips.


This year’s top podcast is called The Master of the Mustache Disguise and the Tiny Dancer…because along with the mustache caper, it included the most downloaded track from the Personal Audio cds. It’s about a guy pretending he wasn’t watching as the lady who used to be his wife crosses a downtown street, leaving him with a question that he’ll probably will never be able to answer. It’s called The Tiny Dancer.


Sometimes it’s the right person…but it’s just the wrong time. That story is from the Night Connections personal audio cd. If you like it you can just keep this podcast, or if you want a fresh copy, just download it from the night connections icon on the opening page.


If you’d like to hear the top five podcasts, ALL the Good Night podcasts are carried (free) at 


Well there it is. Better late than never. The top five podcasts from the last year, on our third anniversary together. Well…a little after our third anniversary together. Thank you for giving me a few minutes of your life every week again this year. And thank you for helping me through the toughest year I have ever experienced in my life. I slipped on that soap Big Louie was warning me about a few times, but so far, I’ve been able to get back up again. And so far, my Lady Wonder Wench still hasn’t started looking around to find the perfect man…even though I’ve been telling her what Big Louie, his own bad self… the chief mustard cutter of the Louie Louie generation has said so often… as we go upward and onward into the summer of year number four together…Louie says, “Sex is better than cutting the grass, no matter what your wife says.”  


Your comments welcome at


King of the Road Feedback

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009

You can feel the summer sweats and the end of love chills with this one from Dave:

Another pair of summer memories, connected but a lifetime apart….

Fireflys, or as we called them, lightning bugs.

On summer evenings when I was a kid, lightning bugs were as symbolic of the season as Phil Rizzuto calling Yankee games on scratchy Sears transistor radios or Sabrett dogs from the truck near the old DeWitt theater.

We all vied to be the first to see the first lightning bug flash of the evening. It was somehow important, although I don’t know why. Firsts were, that was the way of it.

They were large and  flew so slowly; easy to see and watch as they cruised silently in the humid city air. We seldom killed them, as we did mosquitoes; they were harmless, almost totemic symbols of summer. If one landed on your neck or shoulder and, thinking it a wasp or some such horror, you did smash it, you were left with a glowing streak on your fingers, and felt sad.

As I grew up and went to college, grad school and beyond, I sort of forgot about lightning bugs. For years I don’t remember seeing them at all on hot evenings. I have even wondered if they suffered a population crash from all the pesticides we sprayed around in the Sixties.

In 1986 I was driving with my first wife back north from her parents home in far southern New Jersey. We drove in the typical dense, angry silence that characterized the last year of our marriage. The car had no A/C so the windows had to be open, the wind noise making conversation thankfully impractical.

The roads down there are often unlit, and it was fully dark. The tension in the car, the heat, the fog all made the long drive depressing and spooky. As we crossed a bridge over Rancocas creek, I looked out into the darkness along the road and was entranced. The marshy banks of the creek seemed to be lined with Christmas trees. Hundreds, thousands of fireflys – no, lightning bugs – perched on the branches, hovered over the marsh grass, flitted over the black waters of the creek.

I pulled over, ignoring my wife’s complaints, and stared out the window into the hot night, staring at the countless winking cold lights, luciferase greenly oxidizing luciferin in the tails of a million ancient beetles along a dank South Jersey creek bed, all for me. For just a minute, I was no longer an unhappy, soon-to-be-single-again grad student with no money and little hope.

It was summer and I was the first to see the lightning bugs.

Dickie – Quickie

Monday, June 22nd, 2009

Instant youth…just sticking your elbow out the car window…this is a note from Betsy…with a couple of good questions. Any “Queens of the Road” out there ?

Wow, the memory of elbows sticking out of car windows brought back the “good ole days” for me too.  I wonder though why there weren’t near as many Queen of the Roads?  It seemed to be mostly a man thing.  And I wonder why we don’t see it anymore?  At least  I don’t.  Maybe because with a growing population there comes a growing number of roads, and they are wider and faster.  Perhaps in the rural areas, on the farms and ranches, one can still see an occasional elbow or two — I hope so.

The King of the Road

Saturday, June 20th, 2009

A little elbow grease…that’s the answer. A little elbow grease can make you the king of the road. It was a beautiful day around here, so I rolled the car window down and stuck my left elbow out into the breeze…just like I did the day I bought Eddie Kelly’s old Ford for $25. It was an instant “Beam me up Scotty” moment… an instant time warp. I was 18 years old again, I was on summer vacation, I was a Coney Island lifeguard, I had a girlfriend by the name of Matilda who knew how to wear short shorts and T shirts, the Ford had a generous back seat, there was a drive in theater a few blocks away…I was…the king of the road.

It all came back in an instant. Just by sticking my left elbow out of the car window. True happiness. The dark clouds disappeared. King of the road.

The Ford was worth every cent of the $25 dollars I paid for it. It was my King of the Road Mobile. The engine was kinda weak. Sometimes when I turned on the radio, the car slowed down. It was an AM only radio of course, and the reception wasn’t very good, mostly because of the oil that kept leaking all over the antenna. The lights were so dim that when I drove at night I should have held the cigarette lighter out the window.


Dickie – Quickie

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009

A better definition of an expert than the one in the blog/podcast…from Bob:

Good Morning Dick

          I had to chuckle when I listened to your definitions of an expert! I just had to pass on one from my high school math teacher. He was a real old school teacher who was a whiz at math! His definition went like this:


We all know what “X” is in math, the unknown quantity. Such as solve for X in 2X = 30

We all know that a “Spurt” is a drip under pressure

So an X-Spurt is nothing more then an unknown drip under pressure!

Dickie – Quickie #2

Tuesday, June 16th, 2009
Never heard of this guy,  but…he nailed it:
Dick, no one I’ve asked has heard of this singer/songwriter, but having been a DJ, I bet you have.  His name is Michael Johnson and he is best known for his 70’s hit “Bluer Than Blue.”  He was in the Chad Mitchell trio with John Denver for a year.  Luckily, he has friends here in Colorado Springs and so almost every year plays one of the free concerts in the park, so I’m hoping to go see him again tomorrow night.  He has one song “The Moon is Still Over Her Shoulders” that reminds me of your feelings towards Wonder Wench —  
“And the moon is still over her shoulders
And the stars are still still falling above
And she never gets one minute older
And he is still falling in love.”   😉 
I better shut up now before I get shut down with a ritalin tipped blow dart!  😉  

Dickie – Quickie

Tuesday, June 16th, 2009

Another Lady Wonder Wench Fan:

Dick – that was a beautiful podcast, and combining Whitney’s music just added that special touch. Thanks again for touching my heart, and hitting home.
Lady Wonder Wench is right: Whispers are sometimes the loudest form of communication. Smiles and hugs to you

Shut Up And Listen

Saturday, June 13th, 2009

I’ve kind of calmed down now, but I almost crushed the tv changer in my button pushing hand just a few minutes ago. My Lady Wonder Wench fixed things. She kinda smiled at me, and used that soft, warm voice on me…and that got me back under control. I was trying to watch one of those political talking head shows, and I couldn’t understand a thing anybody was saying, because the host and all three guests were trying to talk all at once. That seems to happen all the time now.

I was on the radio for a long time…and when I interviewed somebody on the air, I always told them before the show that only one of us was going to talk at one time. If somebody didn’t respect that, I simply cued the engineer to clip the offending mouth’s mike. That only has to happen once, and the rent an expert usually gets the idea.



Thursday, June 11th, 2009

Some nice “Giggle Back” coming in. For example:

Hi Dick,
I enjoyed your podcast on the “giggle.”  If you are so inclined, I think you would enjoy this link to an “I told you so” giggle that came from my mom and was directed toward her son Bill and his friend Roger, both nearing their mid 60’s.  They live in  Texas and last summer planned to drive up to Colorado in one day to an area of mountains about 2 hrs west of us, pitch their tent, and begin their planned ascents of tall mountains, day after day, for a week,  with no time for even an elevation adjustment.  To make a long story short, the trip went bust from the first day and by the 4th day or so they’d decided to call it quits and drive on over here.  They weren’t too upset with Mom’s “told you so” giggle, figuring they’d made an 89 yr old happy.  (she seems a lot happier here than she did on that happiest day of her life 50 years ago, eh?  😉 )  As you can see she tried to remain serious but quickly “lost” it.   I am giggling in the background, I think more at her laughing than at the trip gone bad.
I especially liked the last sentence of the podcast — yes, giggles know things. 😉

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