The Dick Summer Connection – November 2, 2008

My sister in law Peggy is a smart, independent, successful, Louie-Louie generation woman. And a very good softball player. In fact I’d say the biggest reason Peggy wasn’t drafted by the New York Mets is that like most women she won’t do the basic things a major league ball player must do. She won’t scratch and spit. So much potential female major league talent goes down the drain because of the simple things women won’t do. For example, if a woman were playing third base and a pop fly came her way just as a baby was falling from the stands, the woman would catch the kid, even if the bases were loaded and she could easily have made an unassisted double play at third because the runners were in motion. Women simply have no baseball discipline.

All the women in my family are a challenge to feminists who don’t admit there’s any difference between men and women. Peggy is no exception. She’s very comfortable dividing the domestic work load into two sections…The way she puts it is the Pink jobs are for the women, and the Blue jobs are for the non-women. Peggy very kindly came down here to help when my Lady Wonder Wench got hurt. Here’s how she set things up. Cooking is a pink job, opening the applesauce jar is blue, supervising table manners is pink, doing the dishes is blue. Lugging the laundry basket down to the washing machine is blue… sorting the clothes, washing them and folding them is pink…lugging the finished product upstairs is blue…putting them in the drawers is pink. Taking out the garbage and anything involving a chain saw or the tv remote…very blue all the way. Social planning, neighborhood news gathering, and anything cultural…bright pink. So…Oprah may not approve…but I don’t care…it works. And it’s not complicated. I don’t like complicated. I don’t like being confused.

That’s one of the good things about being a Louie-Louie generation guy. We don’t get confused about the kind of articles you see in some of the young guy’s magazine…like…”What Does It Really Mean To Be A Man In Today’s Society.”

Come on. You’ve got to be kidding. Louie-Louie Generation guys aren’t in the least bit confused. We know that women are a lot more than just soft guys. I mean…we appreciate the soft…a lot. And we understand that it’s a useless, impossible and a senseless waste of time trying to understand women. But just loving them is really…good. What it boils down to is that we’re simple…and women aren’t. Understand that and get over it. Men aren’t from Mars, and women aren’t from Venus. We’re both from Good ol’ Mother Earth. Deal with it.

Deal with the fact that men are competitive and women are cooperative. That’s why smart women tend to take a deep breath, give each other girly smiles, and roll their eyes while they watch us go for the bragging rights.

Now believe me… Louie-Louie Generation guys are as competitive as pimple people generation guys. Pimple people guys may have six pack abs, lots of long wavy hair, and all night stamina…but they simply don’t have our worldly-ness …our over all charm…plus some of us have a little money…all of which of course helps make us the partners of choice for some of the girls next door, certain super-models, and the occasional porn-star.

A big difference between Louie-Louie Generation guys and young guys is that we know when to compete, and when to cooperate, and they get…confused. For example, when the lights are low, and the music is soft and sweet, and the dress code is informal and minimal…young guys sometimes forget that those special three little words a woman wants to hear aren’t… “We’re Number One.” I mean…there are times when you really ought to turn off your cell phone…or at least don’t make outgoing calls.

Big Louie, his own bad self, the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie generation nailed it pretty well I think when he said, “Heros and winners aren’t always the same guys.”

Dick’s Details Quiz – All answers are in the current podcast at

1- What have some of the guys at the gym been guilty of over doing lately ?

2- Which of your fingers doesn’t have a name ?

3- What does it mean if you answer your phone and all you hear is heavy breathing ?

I’ve got to admit that Louie-Louie Generation guys don’t always get the girl. Sometimes…for no apparent reason…the Pimple People generation guys win. There’s a story about that in the new Night Connections 2 Personal Audio Cd. It’s called The Lawyer Lady and the Hunk. Sometimes it’s just hard to understand what women do.

I don’t usually mention the comments from the blog on the website…I know you’re perfectly capable of reading them… but this has to be an exception. It came in last week. It says in part…”You did a podcast about step parents, and you had an anonymous reply about package deals. Well…that was my dad. He’s actually my step dad. He came into my life when I was a self centered, hormone raging 10 year old who wanted what she wanted when she wanted it. I introduced him to people as “my mother’s husband.” I told him “I’ve been without a father since I was two, and I don’t need one now.” I hardly noticed…at all the big times in my life…like when I graduated from high school…he was there. I got mad at him and moved out when I was 18. I really didn’t care about anything or anyone but myself. It took me a long time to realize…that when he agreed to marry mom, he accepted me as well…and he loved us both…in different ways of course, but he really loved us. I have step children now, and when I deal with them, I try to remember what my dad did for me. I love them like I gave birth to them. So take some advice from a step kid and a step mom. “Support your partner. Love the kids like they were your flesh and blood. Stand by them. Support them to the best of your abilities.” And I really need to say just one more thing…Thanks dad.

I didn’t want you to miss this comment.


2 Responses to “The Dick Summer Connection – November 2, 2008”

  1. Hannah's Mom says:

    Thank you, Dick — and thank you Jack too. This means so much to me, and Hannah has come a long way in the last 14 years. She makes me proud to be her Mom.

  2. Pastor Mike says:

    Dick- my thanks too. Your blog reminds me of something John Stienbeck said: “even if you make the assumption that a man could understand a woman- you would never get him to believe it.” and I remember the wisdom of Joe the bartender’s running buddy, Crazy Guggenhiem, who said “people is more strange than ANYTHING!” So true. Pastor Mike