Dick Summer Connection

I’m sitting here in my big, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room…which is good. Because I got an email a little while ago, with some news that would have knocked me down if I weren’t already sitting. When I finished reading it, I called my Lady Wonder Wench, and told her about it. She said something that sounded like, “Oh my God…wow.” I think she was holding her cell phone at arms length as she got to the word “Wow”. I only think that’s what she said, because the last word came out on a note that was so high, and loud, that I couldn’t really hear it, but Golden Retrievers for three blocks around fled in terror, and windows and eyeglasses cracked all over the zip code. It was great news, but it really screwed up my day, because I completely forgot about everything else…including the fact that I was supposed to be interviewed on a radio program about my books and CDs…and I just forgot about it…which was not only un-professional, it was simply inconsiderate and impolite. And I’m a Louie-Louie Generation guy. Louie-Louie Generation guys have manners.

I don’t take manners to extremes…I don’t knock on an oyster before I open its shell. And I can’t stand political correctness…where you don’t tell a guy he’s lost, you suggest that he is in the process of discovering alternate destinations…don’t call a guy a jerk. Say he’s suffering from a cranial-rectal inversion. Don’t say a guy is a cradle robber…say he prefers generationally diverse relationships. And nobody has a dirty mind, although some people have been known to have introspective pornographic moments.

I was going to say that political correctness is childish. But it’s not. It’s stupid. There is a big difference. Children are not stupid. In fact, they’re quick learners. For example, when you’re a kid you learn that no matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize a cat. If your brother hits you, you shouldn’t hit back, because mom always catches the second one. You find out that no matter how good your dog is, you can’t trust him to guard your hamburger. My Lady Wonder Wench learned that you can’t hide an asparagus stalk in your glass of milk. Kids learn. Although there were some things I never did figure out. For example, when Sister Mary Knucklebuster ran a fire drill, it was always…”Line up in silence. No talking. Short kids in front.” I guess she figured that tall people burn slower. “No talking” was also a prime consideration in the duck and cover drills…where we practiced protecting ourselves from thermonuclear destruction by hiding under our desks. We all knew that Sister would give us that look…if we talked during a hydrogen bomb explosion.

Dick’s Details Quiz. All answers are in the current podcast.

1- Where did we get the word, “Oxymoron”?

2- What’s the weirdest “delicacy” I’ve ever heard of ?

3- What is the leading cause of statistics ?

4- Dick’s Details. They take your mind off your mind.

What a surprise that Email was. I was a disc jockey for a long time…so I was used to rejection…”More music less talk.” How to you think the guy hired to say that feels about it ? Disc jockies are brown shoes in a tuxedo world. And of course, disc jockies aren’t the only people who don’t quite fit in. I had a friend by the name of Bill who had that kind of problem. There’s a story about Billy and his lady in the Night Connections 2 personal audio cd. It’s called the Quiet Man’s Woman.

Billy was a funny guy. He called me on the WNBC radio private hot line one night, and he started describing a really ugly, bloody murder scene that he was investigating. I said…”Billy, why are you telling me all this while I’m on the air.” He said, “They had the radio on when the shooting was going on. Guess who they were listening to.” The bad guys got my friend, New York City Police Detective Lt. Billy McGroaraty. It was years ago now. But I still miss him. “The Quiet Man’s Lady,” is from the Night Connections 2 personal audio CD. If you like it, you can just keep the current podcast. Or if you want a fresh copy, just download it from the Night Connections 2 icon on the home page.

I guess I should tell you about the email that knocked me down. I feel kind of funny about it. But If I don’t tell you, you’ll probably hear about it any way. Because the folks who sent the note say they plan on doing quite a bit of publicity. But before I quote the note to you, I want to thank Nancy and Bonnie of the Books and Beyond radio program for forgiving me for forgetting everything else that I was supposed to do…including their interview…when I read that note. They’re radio folks. So they forgave me, and said we’ll do it next week. I appreciate it.

The note says…in part, “Hey Dick, the museum has just unveiled a complete re-design that tells the story of rock and roll in a more linear fashion. We have updated all museum technology to state-of-the-art, including the interactive kiosks. You, and your impact on rock music are featured in the new exhibit.” Signed, Margaret Thresher, Director of Communications, Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Museum, Cleveland, Ohio.

Oh My God, WOW.

This entry was posted on Friday, July 22nd, 2011 at 7:26 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.