Jelly Beans, Daffodils, and Bedtime Stories

I’m sitting here in my big, comfortable, black leather poppa chair in my living room…feeling a little choked up. My Lady Wonder Wench wrote a comment on the blog on Wednesday about the fact that I forgot our wedding anniversary again this year. She said, “My Louie-Louie Lad remembers me all the time…with jelly beans, and daffodils, and holding hands, and laughing at silly jokes, and bedtime stories. Don’t get me wrong, I love getting jewelry and candy and flowers and fancy dinners and marvelous blouses from very fancy shops. But I love my Louie-Louie Lad more.”

 That’s the kind of thing that will make a Louie-Louie Generation guy like me stand up very straight, and look her right in the eyes, and kiss her face until my fillings melt. She slips sexy notes into my shirt pockets. She plays with me, and laughs. She makes me feel powerful, because she lets me make her feel beautiful. I am some kind of lucky guy.

 I know a couple of you who get together with me for this podcast regularly are having your hearts wrung out right now. I know that’s the kind of thing that can make you begin to believe that nothing you always knew about somebody…and counted on…was real. You can begin to think that the things you did together never really happened. You can even begin to think that you’ll never let yourself feel anything again…in fact you can’t remember ever…feeling anything.

 I’m telling you about how good it is with my Lady, because you know we’ve been together for a very long time. And I want you to know that kind of thing really does happen. Sometimes it does work. I don’t know for sure if it will ever work for you…but you don’t know either…for sure…that it won’t. 

 Dick’s Details Quiz. All answers are in the current podcast.

1-    What’s a big threat to Americans in bars ?

2-    What’s so kinky about an oyster ?

3-    What does a hippopotamus have in common with single guys

Dick’s Details. They take your mind off your mind.

 I was telling you that some of you who I know are reading this right now are going through some emotionally tough times. One of the guys is suffering from a big time attack of the what ifs. He’s pushing fifty now, and he realizes he blew it about 20 years ago. She was ready. But he was ambitious. There’s a story about that in the current podcast, and in the Bedtime Stories personal audio cd. It’s called, “The Prince of Fantasy.”

 Mike made a lot of money…that guy in the story. But right now, he’s thinking it might have cost him…something he can’t buy anymore. He’s still a real go getter…”you snooze, you lose” he always says. “The early bird gets the worm.” Yeah…but common Mike…why not calm down and have some bacon and eggs instead. As Big Louie, his own bad self, the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie Generation always says, “It’s the second mouse that gets the cheese.” Mike’s got a lot of company. A lot of guys are more committed to success than they are to relationships…partially…that’s because success means power. And power is sexy. That’s a message guys get from a lot of women. Power is a big part of the price for sex. And that’s a big reason the circle just keeps going around.

 The story is called The Prince of Fantasy. If you like it you can just keep the current podcast, or if you want a fresh copy, just download it from the Bedtime Stories icon on the home page.

 It looks like I hit the nail square on the thumb again. I usually live by the simple wisdom of Jay Leno, the infield fly rule, and Big Louie, his own bad self…who always says, “We’ve got to stop snarling when we talk to ourselves.” We’re always talking about things that go wrong. It’s like some tiny Darth Vader is lurking in our heads, whispering…”Come over to the dark side. We’ve got cookies.” I’m pretty sure I’m not the only guy who’s still in love with his girlfriend after a lot of years.

 Time for a quick poll: On a scale of 1 to 10…ten being best…what score would you give your love life… right this minute. Drop me an Email. Dick at Dick Summer Dot com. I’ll let you know how it works out next time.

 I’ve had about enough of the Dark Side. Tune in to any new channel, and about the most optimistic thing you hear is that, “Things aren’t getting worse quite as fast as they were yesterday. So have as nice a day as you can under the circumstances.”

 There are lots of fun, happy, goodies going on around us all the time. There’s a sign in front of the hardware store down the street that was supposed to say something about a special on screws, but today it’s saying something the guy who put it there didn’t mean because one of the letters fell off.  How about the feeling you get when you slip a silk handkerchief in your jacket pocket.  There was the first smell of rain hitting hot, dry, grass the other day. And the smile on the face of the waiter in the Japanese restaurant where we like to have sushi…because I remembered how to say, Domo Aragato. Listening to my Lady Wonder Wench snapping the bubbles in long strip of bubble wrap.

Sitting with her in front of a fireplace at midnight, listening to the wind suck at the chimney, swirl around the corner of the house, and send little twigs tapping on the window…remembering her standing there in my office…a long time ago…saying I’m here for the secretarial job.

 She was wearing a soft gray sweater, and a plaid skirt with pleats that made it flare a little. When she took a step the hem hesitated a little till it moved to catch up with her hips. She said, “I’m here about the secretary job.” But I was hearing, “I’m here because I’d like to be your girlfriend.” She really was my first girl friend. The first female person in my life who actually wanted me to get to know her. To see…her. And then…to touch her. And to bring her  jelly beans, and daffodils…and hold her hand, and laugh together at silly jokes, and tell each other long, long bedtime stories….

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