Once upon a time, a pretty, talented young lady by the name of Connie Francis sang a tune called, “Stupid Cupid.” If you’re a member of the Louie-Louie Generation, you remember it well. In honor of Valentine’s Day, I took a very un-scientific poll of a bunch of Louie-Louie Generation friends of mine, and the results shocked me. More than 90% of them…both sexes…just kinda blew Valentine’s day off. One guy even said, “That Cupid stuff is just stupid.”
No. It’s not.
I like Valentines’ day. As a member of the Louie-Louie Generation I’ve had enough of Cupid’s arrows stuck in my backside to re-supply the Indians at Custer’s last stand. And some of those arrows really hurt. But as Big Louie, his own bad self, the Chief Mustard Cutter of the Louie-Louie Generation always says, “Kiss the boo-boo, learn a lesson…and move on. Or better yet, get someone to kiss the boo-boo for you.”
The first arrow Cupid shot at me had the name “Jeanie Campbell” on it. She was 6, and I was 7.” It hurt a little…and I didn’t even understand why. But it taught me I could take a little hurting… even the kind I didn’t understand. It sure wasn’t stupid. It was an important lesson. Through the years, some of that little guy’s arrows with other names on them went pretty deep. Lots of boo-boos needed to be kissed. Fortunately, my Lady Wonder Wench is the number one boo-boo kisser in the world. Well, my world anyway.
One of the guys I talked to said, “I’m too old for that kind of thing.” Big Louie went nose to nose with that guy. Louie told him, “You’re never too old as long as you have enough moving parts.”
I like Valentine’s Day. You get to tell somebody, “I love you.” And maybe you’ll get to hear it back. Lots of times it gets sexy. It comes at the beginning of baseball’s Spring Training season. “My Funny Valentine” is a great tune. And it’s not very expensive. What’s not to like ?
There’s a history to Valentine’s Day. It seems there was a priest by the name of Valentinus, who lost his head courtesy of Claudius the Cruel on February 14th in the year 269 AD. Supposedly, Father V. healed his jailer’s blind daughter, fell in love with her, and left a note for her in his cell the night before his execution. The note said, “I love you. From your Valentine.”
Most holy people get a little uncomfortable about romance. Especially the kind where there are fingers and flesh involved. One Christian web site has come up with an idea to keep our minds off our fingers and flesh, by selling “Valentine’s Day cards from God.” It seems to me that us simple Louie-Louie Generation guys could call God excessively stiff competition. No pun intended.
And the Pickle Puss People have come up with a competing day for people who don’t want any part of romance. They call it “Singles Awareness Day.” The initials of Singles Awareness Day, I think appropriately are SAD. I think SAD is…sad. Men and women belong together. There are some exceptions of course and God bless them too. Let’s just say lovers belong together.
But it’s romance that keeps lovers together, not a relationship. There’s a difference between a relationship and a romance. Business have relationships. Lovers have romances. A relationship develops. A romance explodes. A relationship makes progress. A romance makes sweat. Mutual sweating is a great help in keeping the people who are doing the mutually sweating stuck together.
Dick’s Details Quiz. All answers are in the current podcast.
1- Dirty hands can give you a cold. What can give you a warm?
2- How much does the “Average American” eat in a year ?
3- What naughty thing do ¾ of American women do with their bras ?
Dick’s Details. They take your mind off your mind.
Once upon a time there was a pre-Louie-Louie Generation guy who was injured in a fist fight in the navy. Maybe the nasty guy took a swing at him because he had a funny name. The injury left him with a slight lisp. He had big ears too…and and a big heart. Not exactly the makings of a career as a movie star. But that’s what he became. The biggest movie star of his time. His name was Humphrey Bogart.
Some younger Louie-Louie Generation folks may not remember him. But the rest of us will never forget him. Especially on Valentine’s day. He made a lot of movies. But mostly…we remember an old black and white film called, “Casablanca.” One of the things that made the film, was that it featured a tune that I hope will never go away. “You must remember this, a kiss is still a kiss, a sigh is still a sigh. The fundamental things apply, as time goes by. Bogart and his co-star Ingrid Bergman really got it right in Casablanca.
In one scene, he looked at Bergman, who was possibly the most beautiful woman in the world at the time…he looked right at her…for a long time…and he smiled that crooked smile…and he said, “Here’s looking at you kid.” And they cut to a tight shot of Bergman’s face, as she filled the screen with her eyes.
There’s the story of a Valentine’s Day dinner with my Lady Wonder Wench that I think Bogie and Bergman would have understood in this week’s podcast. Maybe you’ll understand it too. I hope you’ll at least give it a listen…especially if you’re feeling a little like Cupid is a real mean guy. And just in case you could use a little Valentine’s Day back rub, there’s one waiting for you in the podcast too.
Cupid isn’t stupid. And as every Louie-Louie Generation member has experienced a few times, the little guy’s arrows can be weapons of mass destruction. But I think if you like the idea of doing some serious mutual sweating…and sticking together…you may have to take a chance and change your tune. “Stupid Cupid” isn’t going to do it for you. You might try that tune the Association did. They called it “Cherish.” You don’t hear that word very much any more. It’s a good word. And slightly sweaty.
Or, if you’re a really big fan of the mutual sweats…turn up the steam and get into that tune the Troggs did…”Wild Thing…You Make My Heart Sing.” Or better yet, Peggy Lee’s “Fever.”
Unfortunately, according to my “Stupid Cupid” poll, an awful lot of people, even some in “good relationships” have “Lost That Lovin Feeling.” It’s a big loss. A terrible quiet. An awful power failure.
Do you suppose some of it is due to a lack of guts ? Are so many people just afraid to stand up and tell Cupid to take his best shot?
I know that sometimes…when there’s only one “Wild Thing” left in the wreckage of a romance…that hurts. Bad. But even if you’ve “Lost That Loving Feeling” you haven’t lost everything. Remember that gorgeous song from the musical Cats:
“Memories, all alone in the moonlight, I can dream of the old days, Life was beautiful then.
I remember the time I knew what happiness was, Let the memories live again.”
Memories count too.
So thanks anyway, Jeannie Campbell. Wherever you are.
Ah such a shame! Before my Sweetheart died, I always remembered her birthday and Valentines day with the mushiest lovey dovey card I could find. It really tickled her to get them (she mentioned it several times!). We did have a glitch over my habit of buying her flowers for no reason (except that I loved her and she loved flowers). She said “what did you do that you needed to buy me flowers”? It took me awhile to convince her that I was just being romantic!
Relationships are important, and you have to work to keep the romance alive! Take it from me, it is worth it.