There’s something amazing about a one night stand. A one night stand isn’t with someone you’d want to spend the rest of your life. He or she is just a quick, overpowering, and blazing memory. Like a lightning flash during a snow storm. Until that’s happened in your life, don’t get your undies all tied up in knots at me asking if I know the importance of commitment. I sure do. I have one with my Lady Wonder Wench.
But how about the energy of a quick and completely irresponsible explosion of hot hormones? That’s a question, not an answer. What do you do about a person who on purpose stands just a few inches too close for you to be comfortable, looks up at you for a moment longer than your blood pressure can handle, and smiles slowly. If you’re in a committed relationship, how many bodily reactions are you allowed to have before you damage the commitment. How much of that natural electricity can you short circuit before your lights go out, your life goes limp, and all three of you are less alive…you, your partner and the stranger. As I said, it’s not an answer…it’s a question. I’m really interested in how you feel about it.
I may tell you sometime why I asked the question.
I know all about those dangerous moments… I’ve been guilty of it during a committed relationship… and I’ve been the stranger… and I’ve been the partner. I’m not sure there is any set “rules” for how far is too far. Each and every relationship is different.. as is the moment…. the only people who can make the rules are the partners in the relationship…. and I don’t think it’s anyone else’s business as to what they decide is too far… or too often….
I have a question!!! WHY do you have to “short-circuit” those reactions and feelings? Instead, take them home to that committed relationship and USE them!!!! That would be taking great stimulii and using them to great advantage for all concerned.
That’s not to say that one-night stands aren’t exciting – and they most certainly have their place. I think most of us probably have “been there and done that”. Certainly leaves one with a lot of great memories – but I think those are better when one is not in a “committed relationship”, unless , as Sheri remarks, the partners are perhaps in an “open” relationship.
As for the person “leaning in” and arching an eyebrow — a lot of that is about gamesmanship and control more than anything else!