Dickie-Quickie

Looks like we’ll have to start a new campaign. “M.A.N.S.” “Men Are Not Slobs.” We just don’t ¬†sweat the small stuff. Like sweat. We have a deep understanding and a thorough appreciation for the human condition. We know for example, that a person’s immune system needs to be active. “Use it or lose it.” That’s why we sometimes skip showering…for a month or so…to give ¬†our immune system some exercise. Often, people who are not guys mis-understand our motives. We need our immune systems to stay healthy so we can stay strong and alert to more effectively protect our women. We love taking showers. Who doesn’t. But sometimes we deprive ourselves of this pleasure to keep our women safe. And what reward do we get for this manly display of heroism? None ! Shameful. (Notice please that the word is HE-roism.)

And sometimes when we notice that our woman is taking a shower, we take the awful chance of letting our immune systems deteriorate by stepping into the shower with her to keep her from slipping on the soap. Nothing worse than slipping on the soap. You would be shocked to learn how often that gets us an elbow to the solar plexus and totally un-ladylike and un-fair accusations suggesting that we have in mind some sinister and tawdry motivation having to do with fleshly pleasures. See ? We can’t win. But we soldier on as we always have, having nothing but our women’s best interests foremost in our minds. And hands. And such.

M.A.N.S. = Men Are Not Slobs. M.A.S. = Men Are Saints.

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