It’s certainly appropriate to have a day in honor of mothers. But how about step-mothers? Disney movies don’t do them much justice. And how about mistresses? Here’s part of the last chapter of my book, Staying Happy Healthy And Hot. It’s called “Smudge”:
“I’ll never step on the moon like Neil Armstrong. I’ll never win a triathlon. My big audience network radio days are behind me. I’ll never make a big mark on life. But maybe I can make a small smudge. In one of my lovin touch books, I said, “Look at life one person at a time.” I think Big Louie would approve of that statement. It’s got Louie Louie Generation ‘Tude.” And it takes guts, because it bucks the system. So I’d appreciate it if you’d help me make a small smudge in life here.
The next time you hear about a woman who is somebody’s mistress, before you jump to any quick conclusions, take a good, hard look at the lives of each of the people involved, one at a time.
My Lady Wonder Wench has been around horses all her life. She knows a couple of wives who stay with their husbands simply because the guys have money and the women want to keep their fancy, expensive horses. I know one of those husbands, and he’s admitted to me that he has a mistress. They really love each other. He doesn’t give his mistress money or jewelry or fancy stuff. She doesn’t want it anyway. There’s nothing that money can buy between them. Just love. Lusty, sweaty, soul scorching love. I think she deserves respect. I’m not sure I’d say the same for the wife involved.
One of the fascinating stories that came from that rescue of the miners in Chile a few years ago was that some of them had mistresses. The media didn’t talk about the mistresses much. That would have caused problems with the Politically Correct Forces for Good in the Community. Mistresses are a little like Stepmothers—they don’t get much respect. And that’s bizarre, because they sometimes become stepmothers. Not usually. But sometimes.
Think about the chance a woman takes when she becomes a mistress just because she loves a man. I’m not talking about mistress-ing for money. I mean mistress-ing for love. I don’t mean a woman who likes to romp with a regiment. I mean a mistress who puts her youth, her reputation, and her beauty at risk, just because she loves one man. She knows going in that a mistress usually loses everything.
Of course, sometimes—not often, but sometimes—she does win. It’s a long shot, but sometimes something wonderful happens for both the woman and the man involved. Louie -Louie gentlemen like to come clean. So, as you might have figured out by now, I had a mistress like that. A beautiful young woman full of love, and joy, and dignity.
I’ll never step on the moon or win a triathlon or talk to the whole country on network radio again. I’ll never make a big mark on life. But please help me make my little smudge. What I’m asking you to do is simple, but it’s kind of hard. Because it goes against the flow.
Any time you might remember me, I’d like it to be as one of the people who got you to look at life one person at a time, in that young woman’s honor.
She is now my Lady Wonder Wench.”
