Today’s podcast is about the great, “How Comes.” For example, how come apartments are a whole bunch of rooms that are stuck together. But we call them Apart-ments. And how come the best chili is hot? This is a very confusing life. Especially the singles scene. More about that in today’s podcast.
Today’s podcast is about “How Comes,” How Come the alarm only goes off when it’s on? And how come the sun on the Raisin Bran box is wearing sun glasses? And how come you have to walk to the back of the drug store to pick up your prescription, but the cigarettes are right up front? And where does the white go when the snow melts? And why is there such a big difference between a wise man and a wise guy? How come we call it a building when it’s already built? Please send any explanations to dick@dicksummer.com
As “Big Louie” the head guy of the Louie Louie Generation says, in today’s podcast: “Monday is a nasty way to spend 1/7th of your life.
The “Backache Monster” sank his claws into my spine yesterday, so I’ve been sitting here in my big, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room recording today’s podcast and counting the few moving parts I seem to have left…on the fingers of one hand. I had a TV dance party show in what seems like a few eons ago. I used to do the Watusi, the Mashed Potatoes, and the Loco Motion with the kids. I didn’t do the Twist because of my bad knees. How come they don’t have dances like that anymore? How come? How come they don’t have TV Dance party shows anymore? Come to think of it, maybe they do, and our kids just won’t tell us about them.
Some stuff in today’s podcast is gone out of our lives and we don’t even notice. Some words and expressions. “I’ll see you in the funny papers. Don’t take any wooden nickels. Not for all the tea in China.” Some things are gone too. Lava Lamps, Hula Hoops, Fedoras, poodle skirts, pedal pushers, and saddle shoes… records …LPs, 45s, and yes, 78s. Telephone booths. Cursive handwriting. How are you going to sign your name if you don’t know how to write in cursive? I get worried that too much personal stuff is going to what they call, the cloud. And I guess I’m a dinosaur, but I’m a pilot. I know from clouds. I don’t trust them. And how about passion? I’m scared we could be losing that too. And I want to keep it. I see men and women sitting at a table in the diner, texting somebody else on their smart phones instead of talking to each other. They walked into that place together, so there was at least a little bit of consent going on. A man and a woman…and at least a little consent. Just a little concent. That’s called the camel’s nose under the tent. If they’ve run out of things to say, why can’t he just hold her hand and look at her? Big Louie always says, “You can never tell when something wonderful is going to happen.” But if you’re watching life unfold on your smart phone screen, you probably won’t notice.
T.G.I.F. is here. So it’s time for Dick’s Details from today’s podcast. Dick’s Details is a bunch of totally un-important stuff for you to stuff in one ear, so you can squeeze the important stuff that’s poking you in the ribs all night out the other ear, and you can grab a grin and win. There is a sign in a National Park in North Carolina that says, “If you are surprised by a bear, don’t run.” I guess bears like fast food. If the answer is “The truth shall set you free” what is the question. Don’t know do you. I’ll tell you in a minute. Black Widow Spiders kill their mates right after sex. They must believe in stopping the snoring before it starts. Whales can communicate with each other over a distance of hundreds of miles. Can’t you just hear it now. “Hey Joe…can you hear me now?” If the answer is “The truth shall set you free” the question is “What will happen if you tell your boss what you really think of him?” The truth shall set you free. A good example of the fact that trouble usually starts out as looking like fun. Dick’s Details. They take your mind off your mind. A little house keeping here. If you like these podcasts, or my spoken word story CDs at dick summer dot com, or my book Staying Happy Healthy And Hot available at Amazon dot com, please tell a couple of friends, because they might like them too and you would be doing me a favor. Thanks.
I’m sure by now you’ve heard the expression “Life is a sexually transmitted disease.” In today’s podcast I was wondering wouldn’t it be interesting to meet the guy who invented sex, and see what he’s working on now? I like words, and I sometimes wonder why we call it sex. I guess that’s a lot more efficient than calling it, “Oh God, Oh God, Yes, Yes, Yes, umm, oooh, aahh, AIEE. Actually, sex is never the answer. Sex is the question. Hopefully, the answer is usually OH YES. I wonder if it’s really pre-marital sex if you don’t really plan on getting married. And how come if a man uses suggestive language to a woman it’s sexual harassment. But if a woman uses suggestive language to a man it’s $5 a minute.
Today’s podcast is about losing some things, and some words. We don’t even notice while they’re disappearing.Some expressions keep kicking around in the back of my head. I’m mostly retired now…and what does that mean? RE-TIRED sounds like I got tired, perked up again, and got tired again so I’m “Re-Tired.” Recreation is what lots of retired people do. What does “Recreation” mean? Re-Creation. It sounds like your self is making itself again while you’re distracted by having fun. I found out that’s pretty much true. Your self heals itself when you get out of the way. As Big Louie, the head guy of the Louie Louie Generation always says, “The older you get the more important it is that you don’t act your age. If you have any moving parts left, MOVE ‘EM for crying out loud. Because when you move them, you’re paying attention to them. You don’t want your moving parts to just disappear. Some things we’ve got to keep. Big Louie always says, “If you have any moving parts left, for heaven’s sake…MOVE ‘EM.
